In a Hurry to Wait

I was on a plane the other day and had the privilege of sitting next to a couple of interesting people. The man, sitting by the window, was in his mid-fifties, and the young woman was in her mid-twenties. I believe in total transparency, so I may as well give away my age.

I’m 29.

For the 9th time.

Anyway, when we first boarded the plane, the two strangers next to me instantly struck up a conversation. I always eaves drop. I can’t help myself. It’s just one of those things I do. It isn’t for any sinister reasons, so I hope that no one reading this thinks I’m some sort of weirdo.

Rather, I like to listen in to people’s conversations in hopes that I can join the discussion. I love meeting new people and interacting with them. Maybe it’s the counselor in me. Or maybe I’ve always just been a person who loves to talk and listen.

The two strangers were talking about an interesting phenomenon that happens every single time a plane lands. I was sitting quietly, not minding my own business, when they mentioned how odd it is that as soon as the plane touches down and taxis off the runway, people begin unfastening their seat belts. It’s as if they are caged animals, desperate for freedom and that little belt is the only thing standing in their way.

I laughed quietly to myself as they were discussing this because I’d always noticed the same thing, but never really mentioned it to anyone else.

I bluntly told both of the strangers next to me that I’d noticed the same peculiar thing, and our conversation quickly went to another odd behavior we’d noticed after a plane lands.

We noticed that when a plane pulls up to the airport, as soon as it comes to a stop and the seat belt like goes off, everyone on the aisle stands up as quickly as possible and starts racing to grab their bags from under the seats or from the overhead bins.

As soon as they’ve retrieved their things, the people stand there impatiently waiting for the doors to open and everyone in front of them to get off. Again, it’s like the caged animal thing.

The woman in our conversation mentioned that one time, she’d been on the aisle and simply sat there, waiting patiently. As she did so, a woman in the middle seat next to her climbed over her, desperate to claim her space in line. After she did, my new friend said that the woman ended up standing their waiting for ten minutes.

Why?

What is it inside of us that tells us we have to hurry up to claim our spot in the line to wait?

Look, even if you are running tight on your schedule for your connecting flight, I seriously doubt that you are going to make up any time by climbing over the person to your left. Not to mention the fact that you look ridiculous doing it.

I think it is the possessive nature of humans combined with some instinctive competitiveness. It makes us think that we have to be first to get to something or somewhere. And if someone is in our way, we have to get by them to claim our rightful place.

This sort of thing happens on the roads too. People get angry on the roads when someone needs to merge over into their lane. The other driver knew that they should have gotten over several minutes ago, but they cheated, and pushed their way into your spot.

Did that person make you any later to your destination?

Not likely.

It is that entitled, possessive creature inside of us that tells us, “No, that is mine and you can’t be there.” It’s that kind of thought process that can often lead to road rage, jealousy, assault, murder, and even war. Even if none of that horrible stuff happens, it causes an immense amount of stress on your mind and body. If you don’t know what stress does, just know it is basically the source of all bad things that goes on with the human body.

What would happen if everyone on the plane simply stayed in their seats when it came to a complete stop? The aisle would be clear. You could continue talking with the people next to you that you just met a few hours ago without any rush. Could you imagine what the plane or the roads would look like if everyone had a sense of patience, and good will?

Do you have problems with some things like this? I know I do on occasion. I get in such a hurry that I feel like if I’m slowed down at all that the universe is going to evaporate or something.

It won’t. Everything is going to be okay. We need to put that in our minds. We need to tell ourselves that we are going to get there eventually, and when we do, it’s all going to work out.

Are there some reasons you should be in a hurry in life? Absolutely. I’m thinking things like: water just broke, really need to go to the bathroom, or you accidentally sent an email to the entire building instead of just one person. (Always check to make sure you didn’t “reply to all.”)  ;)

Other than a few times in life, try being a little more patient. When the plane lands and docks with the airport, tell yourself that you’ll get to the terminal in good time. There’s no rush. Even if there is, your hurry isn’t to get in line and wait. Your hurry should be to relax and enjoy each second you have. Let everyone else stress out about why the door hasn’t opened or why no one is moving.

You know better. And you are happier for it.

What are some things you’ve done or noticed other people doing that, after a second observation, seem to add pointless stress?

Let me know in the comments, and share with others what your solution is.

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Friends With Benefits

Over the last few years, the term “friends with benefits” has become fairly common. Although, I think its meaning could be tweaked a little.

I have been blessed in this life to have many friends, and it seems with every passing day I meet another one, sometimes more than one. This usually happens as a result of disobeying my parents’ instructions to not talk to strangers. It seems that no matter where I go, I can always find something to talk about with someone I’ve never met before.

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to meet several new people in a short amount of time.  Each one of them was uniquely different, with a special perspective on life, work, and play. Continue reading

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Get Your Mind Right

At different times of the day, you will encounter challenges, moments where things are more difficult than usual. Hopefully these troublesome times are outliers, anomalies to your otherwise happy day.

When they do hit, these challenges can invoke a range of emotions.

Feelings and emotions have a powerful impact on the world around us, and on our bodies. A quick reference to that would be the often documented effects that stress have on humans.

Our emotions are unbridled, raw energy that can spring up at any moment, especially when triggered. Knowing this, and realizing that feelings have such a strong impact on so many different things, it is critical that we learn how to control them. Continue reading

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The Only True Recipe for Success (Warning: You may be disappointed)

A lot of people say that practice makes perfect.

Well, that’s a load of bull.

It really is. And don’t think I’m going the direction of “perfect practice makes perfect.” Because that isn’t true either. Nothing is ever perfect, much less practice. It doesn’t make perfect because practice is never done. Even when you reach your highest goals, your pinnacle of achievement, your job is not over. It can’t be. Continue reading

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Find Your Adventure

I was talking with a  friend of mine the other day. I call him the real-life most interesting man in the world. He’s been to countries all over the world, hung out with Buddhist monks, build homes in strange lands with Habitat for Humanity, and has had countless other experiences that make him deserving of that title.

During our conversation, he started talking about how I needed to have some adventure. I found his comment funny because I write books that are full of adventure. He explained that I needed to have some adventures of my own, real ones in places I’d never been before.

I was curious. I asked him what his definition of adventure was. His answer was simple yet beautiful. Continue reading

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No Regrets Allowed

Sometimes people ask me for advice about big decisions they have to make. I always tell them I don’t like to give advice because then they can blame me for any undesired outcomes that may result.

That’s kind of a joke but not really. So, instead of giving advice, I try to show people how to work through their own answers and choose the best one. That way, they can always take full responsibility for anything good, or bad that happens. Continue reading

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